Author Topic: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread  (Read 707913 times)

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Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1080 on: October 29, 2022, 03:56:58 PM »
Since a contractor sliced my cable yesterday and I follow the rules....I shall leave this here........What do you call a young gold digger??....A minor...😁
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1081 on: November 19, 2022, 08:43:01 PM »
When I was a kid I spent as much time as I could building sandcastles with my grandfather....

But my mom would catch me and make me put him back in the urn.  :?
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1082 on: November 19, 2022, 10:32:23 PM »
Yo Bob......I told Patti I would like to be cremated. She made an appointment for Tuesday.....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1083 on: November 19, 2022, 10:57:46 PM »
Jerry, Linda and I were at the lawyers office signing Trust, Wills, POA, and Medical decision documents... Linda got to the part where she had to sign that I could make medical decisions for her.... she was hesitant, asked the lawyer to explain how that worked... I said "don't worry darlin' I won't put you down if you get a head cold"... the lawyer was dumbfounded... he couldn't talk for several minutes.... not sure if he was going to shit or go blind  lol8  :deal
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1084 on: November 24, 2022, 01:55:15 PM »
What did the turkey type into his new computer??? Google-Google...
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1085 on: January 01, 2023, 01:04:47 PM »
Hmm....An old Lang sign.....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1086 on: January 02, 2023, 01:10:38 PM »
My New Year?s resolution is to stop procrastinating...

but I'm going to wait until next year to start :cheers:
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

Offline Seldom Seen Slim

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1087 on: January 02, 2023, 02:28:47 PM »
I keep putting off looking it up:  What does procrastinate mean?
Jon E. Wennerberg
 a/k/a Seldom Seen Slim
 Skandia, Michigan
 (that's way up north)
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Owner of landracing.com

Offline Stainless1

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1088 on: January 03, 2023, 09:06:18 PM »
It means neither of you can claim to be amateur crastinators any more  :cheers:
« Last Edit: February 27, 2023, 08:32:11 PM by Stainless1 »
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1089 on: February 27, 2023, 04:46:17 PM »
And you and your like minded friends could start your own country!! You would have your very own procrasti-nation.😃😃😃
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1090 on: February 27, 2023, 05:35:21 PM »
My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate; I said "Just wait."
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1091 on: April 19, 2023, 10:01:13 PM »
Last week, Patti asked me to pass a lipstick and I accidentally passed a glue stick. She still isn't speaking to me.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1092 on: December 04, 2023, 06:01:40 AM »
Called a limo service for a ride to the airport and learned the fee does not include the driver..🤔..$250 and nothing to chauffeur it.....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1093 on: January 08, 2024, 09:23:44 PM »
Speaking of Greek mythology....Hercules had a crazy brother named Testiclees....He was nuts. 1drink
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #1094 on: January 09, 2024, 11:28:42 AM »
Linda was drying her hair when the power in the bathroom went off.... she asked me to take a look at it... I refused
 :cheers:
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O