1. How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb? How many can you afford?
2. A man walks into a bar and orders 5 drinks. He downs the 1st, 3rd, and 5th one. He comments to the bartender, “My doctor says I can only have the odd drink.
3. “I never said all of that stuff in the fortune cookies,” said Confucius.
4. I try to put on a brave face every day. I may walk around like everything is fine, but deep down ...… my socks are sliding down into my shoes.
5. What is the difference between being dedicated and being committed, you ask? Example: To make bacon and eggs, the chicken is dedicated ...… but the pig is committed.