"OK, today on the House Floor we are working on Build # 110516277844. Everybody put in your demands for this build. The customer is looking for a white minivan."
Can't be white. Rainbow paint option $2,500.
Minivans endorse excessive population. Needs to be a 3 seater.
It must run on electricity, but Pennsylania demands the electricity be generated with coal.
Having four tires just overloads our existing landfills. EPA puts a cap of 2 tires on it.
Stereo must have a G-Chip in it, so socially-unacceptable broadcasts are filtered out. G-Chips are on backorder, so just snip the speaker wires.
A/C makes the occupants unaware of global warming, so it only has a heater. You cannot turn it off.
Due to the Majority of the House, the right turn signal is deleted for this model year.
It must have a trailer attached that is filled with 10 bushels of corn, or the build will not pass.
Then the President vetos the build, because it doesn't have enough foreign content.