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Author Topic: Stupid joke FRIDAY  (Read 2173190 times)

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Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5040 on: April 14, 2023, 02:27:19 PM »
I stayed up all night studying, at one point I was wondering when the sun comes up. Then, suddenly, it dawned on me...
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John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5041 on: April 14, 2023, 03:11:27 PM »
I had a teacher who was also a cannibal....Every time she spoke was a Hannibal Lecture.
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5042 on: April 14, 2023, 03:14:30 PM »
Same teacher always said we should follow our dreams...Yet she would not let me sleep in class.... :friday
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5043 on: April 14, 2023, 03:19:02 PM »
You ever wonder if your math teacher was a pirate and wanted you to find X so they could get the treasure? 1drink
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Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5044 on: April 14, 2023, 04:18:01 PM »
Calculus has a steep learning curve...
But at least you know exactly how steep the learning curve is!
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Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5045 on: April 14, 2023, 04:19:55 PM »
Mike Tyson just received a graduate-level certification in advanced calculus...
He calls it his Mathsters Degree...
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Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5046 on: April 14, 2023, 05:13:36 PM »
Thanks Jim for some real humor - I think I heard most of those on the live shows - they were not to be missed!  :cheers:

Let the plagiarism continue:

Be grateful that no matter how much chocolate you eat, your earrings will still fit!

They say 40 is the new 30, and 50 is the new 40, but all I know is the older I get, the more 9pm is the new midnight!

I asked my waitress how they prepare their chicken. She said, "We tell them straight out they're going to die!"

Don't tell secrets in the garden! The potatoes have eyes, the corn has ears and the beanstalk!

I had a great plant based burger the other day. From a meat processing plant!

My teacher told me not to worry about spelling because in the future there will be autocorrect and for that I am eternally grapefruit!

I'll take a brake now!

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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5047 on: April 14, 2023, 06:54:43 PM »
It's the first day of indoctri.....🤔...SCHOOL and the teacher is asking the students what their non-birthing parental unit does for a living. Little Suzie stands and tells the class that her dad is a magician and does really neat tricks , like sawing a person in two!!! The teacher asks if she has any siblings and Suzie says..."Yes, A half brother and half sister." 1drink
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Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5048 on: April 21, 2023, 04:10:41 AM »
Why do ducks have feathers?...To cover up his butt quack
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5049 on: April 21, 2023, 05:52:33 AM »
How do you celebrate a pig's birthday?....By bacon him a cake. 😀
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Offline fastesthonda_jim

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5050 on: April 21, 2023, 10:06:13 AM »
What do you call it when you take your prize winning pig to the pawn shop?

Why, a ham hock, of course.
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Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5051 on: April 21, 2023, 02:31:42 PM »
What steps do you take if a tiger is running toward you...Big ones!
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Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5052 on: April 21, 2023, 05:51:27 PM »
Since it seems to be animal Friday everybody sing along....  :friday
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5053 on: April 21, 2023, 06:18:01 PM »
Yo Bob...
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Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #5054 on: April 21, 2023, 09:45:47 PM »
Why do sheep herders wear 501 Levi's with button flys...
Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away
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