Author Topic: Stupid joke FRIDAY  (Read 2173231 times)

0 Members and 5 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline fastesthonda_jim

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 587
  • Ready to Rock 2003
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4965 on: December 23, 2022, 09:03:25 AM »
Speaking of hawks (don't wanna ruin the thread you've started, Jer)
Anyway, speaking of hawks, my uncle has the heart of a lion, the eyes of a hawk, and the legs of a cheetah



He's also a trained taxidermist
2006 SCTA High Points Champeen
2006 Dirty "2" Wrench Of The Year
Bonneville "2" Club 2003
El Mirage Dirty "2"'s 2006
Bonneville Records: G/GS, F/GS (Boy)  G/FS (Girl)
El Mirage Records: F/BFS, F/FS, F/GS, I/FS, I/GS, K/BGS
FIA Records A, II, 8
Unlimited License
300mph line qualified (305.129 best mile speed)
The older half of San Diego's Fastest Couple
2016 Man of Distinction Award
DLRA 2019 Top Speed of The Meet (309.438 Mile - 323.3 GPS)

Offline Speed Limit 1000

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1398
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4966 on: December 23, 2022, 09:09:38 AM »
What do you call a broke Santa Claus? Saint-Nickel-Less
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

Offline Speed Limit 1000

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1398
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4967 on: December 23, 2022, 09:11:53 AM »
What does Mrs. Claus get when she wears tight pants...A mistletoe
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4251
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4968 on: December 23, 2022, 04:30:30 PM »
Yo Jim....My uncle had the exact same animal parts....And a lifetime ban from the zoo.... 1drink
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4251
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4969 on: December 23, 2022, 04:35:30 PM »
Weather update....The snow is not accumulating here in G.R....It is going sideways far too fast for that.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4251
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4970 on: December 30, 2022, 07:56:49 AM »
Where did the math teacher go to celebrate New Year's Eve?..Times Square.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline fastesthonda_jim

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 587
  • Ready to Rock 2003
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4971 on: December 30, 2022, 09:53:19 AM »
Funny.  I had thought he would have spent it on the Continental Divide - not nearly as crowded.
2006 SCTA High Points Champeen
2006 Dirty "2" Wrench Of The Year
Bonneville "2" Club 2003
El Mirage Dirty "2"'s 2006
Bonneville Records: G/GS, F/GS (Boy)  G/FS (Girl)
El Mirage Records: F/BFS, F/FS, F/GS, I/FS, I/GS, K/BGS
FIA Records A, II, 8
Unlimited License
300mph line qualified (305.129 best mile speed)
The older half of San Diego's Fastest Couple
2016 Man of Distinction Award
DLRA 2019 Top Speed of The Meet (309.438 Mile - 323.3 GPS)

Offline Stainless1

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 8973
  • Robert W. P. "Stainless" Steele
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4972 on: December 30, 2022, 10:05:38 AM »
Not to change the subject, but I was talking to a member of the local nudist colony and he answered an age old question....
bares do shit in the woods...  :cheers:
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4251
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4973 on: December 30, 2022, 02:48:42 PM »
Well Jim....If he goes there he should wear glasses....They improve di-vision.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4251
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4974 on: January 06, 2023, 09:04:01 AM »
Speaking of education.....My teachers always said I should follow my dreams....Yet every time I fell asleep in class they would wake me🤔 So confusing.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline fastesthonda_jim

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 587
  • Ready to Rock 2003
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4975 on: January 06, 2023, 09:23:56 AM »
As long as we insist on trying to become smarter (that edumacation thingie, donchaknow) I heard a story the other day over the wireless.
Seems one day the sex education teacher was going to explain how to use a condom, and had brought a banana to class. 
When queried about the banana he replied, "It's because I find it difficult to get an erection on an empty stomach." 
2006 SCTA High Points Champeen
2006 Dirty "2" Wrench Of The Year
Bonneville "2" Club 2003
El Mirage Dirty "2"'s 2006
Bonneville Records: G/GS, F/GS (Boy)  G/FS (Girl)
El Mirage Records: F/BFS, F/FS, F/GS, I/FS, I/GS, K/BGS
FIA Records A, II, 8
Unlimited License
300mph line qualified (305.129 best mile speed)
The older half of San Diego's Fastest Couple
2016 Man of Distinction Award
DLRA 2019 Top Speed of The Meet (309.438 Mile - 323.3 GPS)

Offline Stainless1

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 8973
  • Robert W. P. "Stainless" Steele
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4976 on: January 06, 2023, 09:36:06 AM »
Speaking of education.....My teachers always said I should follow my dreams....Yet every time I fell asleep in class they would wake me🤔 So confusing.

Jer... probably the snoring was keeping the other students awake...
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4251
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4977 on: January 13, 2023, 08:57:13 AM »
What do ghosts do for fun on Friday the13th?? ...Ride elevators..They raise the spirits..
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Speed Limit 1000

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1398
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4978 on: January 13, 2023, 04:04:25 PM »
Which pasta dish do Italian people eat on Friday the 13th?... Fettuccine Afraid-o
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4251
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: Stupid joke FRIDAY
« Reply #4979 on: January 13, 2023, 04:12:29 PM »
Friday the 13th ??  I am not superstitious....I' m just 'stitious..
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.