Author Topic: Stupid joke FRIDAY  (Read 2167931 times)

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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4545 on: February 26, 2021, 10:56:30 AM »
Reminds me of the Viking who came home from a voyage and found his name had been removed from the town register.....His wife questioned the mayor about it and he said...."I must have taken Leif off my census"
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4546 on: February 26, 2021, 10:57:39 AM »
Why did Leif buy an old boat???...He couldn't A fjord a new one.. :dhorse:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4547 on: February 26, 2021, 11:18:39 AM »
I heard Eric red him the riot act!  :-P
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Offline tortoise

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4548 on: February 26, 2021, 12:21:41 PM »
Patti glanced in my direction and said "What rhymes with orange"... I replied " No it doesn't"...... 1drink
The four engineers
wore orange brassieres.

Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4549 on: February 26, 2021, 01:10:11 PM »
Is this fuel allowed?  :?
All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz

Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4550 on: February 26, 2021, 01:11:50 PM »
Finally, a real cause to support!  :cheers:
All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4551 on: February 26, 2021, 02:47:41 PM »
Patti is too clothes minded...
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4552 on: March 05, 2021, 08:53:53 AM »
Searched online for a way to start a fire.....Kept getting "no matches found".....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4553 on: March 05, 2021, 09:41:23 AM »
Doug Jones lived all his life in the Florida Keys; he is on his deathbed and knows the end is near.
 
His nurse, his wife, his daughter and two sons are with him.
 
He asks for two witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to record his last wishes, and when all is ready, he begins to speak.
 
?My son, Bernie, I want you to take the Ocean Reef houses.?
 
?My daughter Sybil, you take the apartments between mile markers 100 and Tavernier.?
 
?My son, Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in the Marathon Government Center.?
 
?Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on the bayside of Backwater Sound.?
 
The nurse and witnesses are blown away as they did not realize his extensive holdings; and as Doug slips away, the nurse says, ?Mrs. Jones, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property.?
 
The wife replies, ?The a**hole had a paper route.?
All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4554 on: March 05, 2021, 10:39:43 AM »
O.K. Woody......My paper boy didn't deliver mine so I went next door and grabbed the neighbors......In hind sight kidnapping was an excessive response....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4555 on: March 05, 2021, 10:57:24 AM »
Hey Jerry, I read when you were a paperboy you masturbated on the job....

It was all over the news....  :naughty  :cheers:
Stainless
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4556 on: March 05, 2021, 03:35:11 PM »
Bob..Only on Palm Sunday.....   :clap
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4557 on: March 05, 2021, 03:55:51 PM »
Bob, that should still be a secret - Jer says he only used the classifieds!  :evil:
All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4558 on: March 12, 2021, 06:41:02 AM »
Where does a farmer go to buy medicine?..To a farm-acist
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4559 on: March 12, 2021, 09:51:06 AM »
All the anti-wheat internet folks are telling me to stop growing it.... But we are sticking with it... I guess I'm a gluten for pun-ishment
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O