Four drunks are in a bar talking and trying to figure out what the fastest thing that there is, the 1st drunk says , "Light, it goes 186,000 miles per second, and that's what everything is measured by". The drunks think about this for a few seconds, and then the second drunk speaks up. "I think the fastest thing is a blink, says in the Bible that he will come in the blinking of an eye, gotta be the fastest thing". The 3rd drunk says "Naah, that can't be it, you gotta think about blinking, so a thought has gotta be faster than that. I say a thought is the fastest thing". The other three drunks look at the fourth who has his head on the Bar almost passed out and ask him what he thinks is the fastest thing. The 4th drunk lifts his head, says "Diarrhea" and puts his head back on the bar. The other three drunks look at each other, and wake the 4th drunk back up to explain his answer. He replies "Yesterday morning, after drinking all night, I went to bed, and before I could think, blink, or turn a light on, I had Subaru all over myself".