Author Topic: Stupid joke FRIDAY  (Read 2147237 times)

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Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4260 on: May 22, 2020, 11:16:54 AM »
If you get going on that your could call it The Mayflour  and ship stuff to new places.... as John Wayne would finish... Pilgrim....
 :cheers:
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline Happy Pappy

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4261 on: May 22, 2020, 01:56:25 PM »
A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the Hospital.
 While on the operating table she had a near death experience.
 Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?"
 God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
 Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.
After her final operation, she was released from the hospital.
 While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
 Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 43 years to live. Why didn't you pull me from the path of that ambulance?"

God replied:

 "I didn't recognize you!"
Chris Campbell
2017 #203 G/GR El mirage record 150.771
2020 #62 C/AIR El Mirage record 180.828
6/21 #62 C/AIR El Mirage record 185.488
9/21 #62 C/AIR El Mirage record 194.450

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4262 on: May 22, 2020, 02:51:29 PM »
Grand idea Bob...I May knead to borrow some dough....Pay you back.after my first sail...... :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4263 on: May 22, 2020, 03:17:38 PM »
Always rocking the boat...I am so nauti, :naughty
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4264 on: May 29, 2020, 07:32:40 AM »
Reminds of the guy who walked across France wearing sandals....His name was Philippe Phloppe :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4265 on: May 29, 2020, 07:59:39 AM »
This just in from Patti.....What do you call a  South American receptionist who is always in a hurry?? Urgent Tina....  :clap
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4266 on: May 29, 2020, 08:09:05 AM »
What do you call a dinosaur wearing high heels?? Myfeetaresaurus
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4267 on: May 29, 2020, 10:38:38 AM »
Hey Jerry, Did you hear about the guy with a jurisprudence fetishist?


Yea, didn't think so.... he got off on a technicality.
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline Seldom Seen Slim

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4268 on: May 29, 2020, 10:40:23 AM »
WoW, Stainless.  That one took some doing.  Good effort. :cheers:
Jon E. Wennerberg
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4269 on: May 29, 2020, 02:39:00 PM »
Did Rorschach ever paint anything other than chicks with big boobs? :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4270 on: May 29, 2020, 10:55:30 PM »
Didn't he jump off a bridge in Paris because everyone thought he was in Seine  :naughty  :cheers:
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4271 on: June 05, 2020, 07:51:34 AM »
Which animal has more lives than a cat??  The frog..they croak every day :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4272 on: June 05, 2020, 07:55:51 AM »
Of a bear puts on shoes..does it still have bear feet? :clap
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4273 on: June 12, 2020, 07:36:34 AM »
What do you call a scantily clad girl on a drummer's arm???  A tattoo :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #4274 on: June 12, 2020, 09:52:39 AM »
How do you get a bass player to turn down the volume on his amp?? Put sheet music in front of him ..😀
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.