L.C. Leprechaun, known by his friends and children everywhere as "Lucky", was found bludgeoned to death is his upper east side flat Tuesday morning. Officials described the scene as "a milk bath", with small, colorful marshmallow candies shaped like "pink hearts, yellow moons, orange stars, and green clovers", scattered around Mr. Leprechaun's lifeless and beaten body.
Shocked neighbors described Mr. Leprechaun as outgoing, yet paranoid, citing numerous instances when he'd warn his neighbors, "They're always after me lucky charms".
A short press release from General Foods, Mr. Leprechaun's long-time employer, expressed the company's condolences to friends and family, but an unnamed source within the organization suspects a gangland connection to the murder.
The unnamed source notes "rising tensions" in the competitive breakfast cereal market, and squarely lays blame for the murder at the feet of reputed cereal syndicate boss, known only as "Cap'n Crunch", and his Life-long associate, Mike E.
When asked about an organized crime connection, police officials refused to speculate, only describing the crime as "Tragically malicious".
Topic: Stupid joke FRIDAY (Read 2160221 times)