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Author Topic: Stupid joke FRIDAY  (Read 2167797 times)

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Offline JustaRacer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1110 on: October 26, 2012, 02:49:32 PM »
I can swallow 2 pieces of rope, and when I pass them, they are firmly connected.

I shiit you knot...
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My doctor told me to go out and kill people.
Well, sort of.  He told me to reduce the stress in my life.

Offline Kevin G

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1111 on: October 26, 2012, 03:45:52 PM »
I've heard that Neal Armstrong used to tell really dumb jokes about the Moon. When no one laughed he'd just shrug and say "guess you had to be there"
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1112 on: November 02, 2012, 08:33:17 AM »
From the " Better late than never" department......Where do ghosts buy food?....At the Ghostery Store.... :lol:          Why don`t ghosts like going out in the rain??..Because it dampens their spirits.... :wink:Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand...How do you fix a broken Jack  0` Lantern???   ..With a pumpkin patch   :cheers:
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Offline Dr Goggles

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1113 on: November 02, 2012, 08:44:19 AM »
got diced pumpkin with a meal the other night, I thought "what's the chance of that?"
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Offline Milwaukee Midget

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1114 on: November 02, 2012, 09:28:38 AM »
Quote from: Dr Goggles on November 02, 2012, 08:44:19 AM
got diced pumpkin with a meal the other night, I thought "what's the chance of that?"

All's well; that end's welded.

Back to the shed, Doc . . .
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"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

Offline mstrdinan

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1115 on: November 02, 2012, 09:53:54 AM »
what do you call a Hooker's fart?

                        a prostitoot
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Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1116 on: November 02, 2012, 09:55:48 AM »
What do ghosts drink at a Halloween party?
Ghoul aid...
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Offline Dr Goggles

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1117 on: November 02, 2012, 10:04:23 AM »
cnkcnkcnkcnk....dice, chance... :roll:
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Few understand what I'm trying to do but they vastly outnumber those who understand why...................

http://thespiritofsunshine.blogspot.com/

Current Australian E/GL record holder at 215.041mph

THE LUCKIEST MAN IN SLOW BUSINESS.

Offline maguromic

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1118 on: November 02, 2012, 10:58:17 AM »
Why did the tomato turn red?  Because it saw the salad dressing!  Tony
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Offline JustaRacer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1119 on: November 02, 2012, 11:03:48 AM »
Hijack -

Not a joke.

A group of Trick or Treater's came to the door towards the end of the evening.  For the first 1/2 of the night I was wearing a devil mask; so scary looking that some kids would not come to the door until I took it off.

But now I was wearing a different, equally hideous mask (Davey Jones from Pirates of the Caribbean), that wasn't as hot inside.

"Hey Mister, weren't you wearing a devil mask when we came by earlier????" a few of the group exclaimed.  Step One - Think.  Step Two - Talk.

I blame the school system ...
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My doctor told me to go out and kill people.
Well, sort of.  He told me to reduce the stress in my life.

Offline Peter Jack

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1120 on: November 02, 2012, 11:47:14 AM »
Still pretty funny!  :roll: :roll: :-D

Pete
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1121 on: November 09, 2012, 09:29:44 AM »
I`ve decided to learn sign language...I think it will come in handy........................ :cheers:
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1122 on: November 09, 2012, 09:31:10 AM »
Post election bonus.........................I had to buy a new colander..The old one couldn`t take the strain
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1123 on: November 16, 2012, 08:02:54 AM »
Why don`t turkeys eat on Thanksgiving Day ?...Because they are already stuffed :cheers:
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I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #1124 on: November 16, 2012, 09:45:18 AM »
The local Catholic church has started using a bus to bring people to services on Sunday.
They are calling it mass transit.
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