Author Topic: Stupid joke FRIDAY  (Read 2165719 times)

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Offline 38flattie

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #870 on: March 16, 2012, 08:33:29 PM »
 :-D :-D :cheers:
With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. However, this is not necessarily a good idea. It is hard to be sure where they are going to land, and it could be dangerous sitting under them as they fly overhead. -- RFC 1925

You can't make a race horse out of a pig. But if you work hard enough at it you can make a mighty fast pig. - Bob Akin

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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #871 on: March 23, 2012, 09:18:32 AM »
Know why there are so many Smith`s in the phone book???...Because they all have phones... :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #872 on: March 23, 2012, 09:19:20 AM »
An old man walks into the barbershop for a shave and a haircut, but he tells the barber he can't get all his whiskers off because his cheeks are wrinkled from age.
 
The barber gets a little wooden ball from a cup on the shelf and tells him to put it inside his cheek to spread out the skin.
 
When he's finished, the old man tells the barber that was the cleanest shave he's had in years, but he wanted to know what would have happened if he had swallowed the little ball.
 
The barber replied, "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does."  :cheers:
All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #873 on: March 23, 2012, 09:19:28 AM »
Where do you get Virgin wool ??..........Ugly sheep................. :evil:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #874 on: March 23, 2012, 10:10:05 AM »
What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of an airplane?
Meee!

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #875 on: March 23, 2012, 10:11:44 AM »
What did Spock find in the bathroom of the starship Enterprise?
The captains log.

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #876 on: March 23, 2012, 10:14:51 AM »
What do you call a piece of wood with nothing to do?
Board.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #877 on: March 25, 2012, 12:21:45 PM »
THAT,,^^^^^^^^^^ Is how this thread works.. BRAVO !!!!! :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Milwaukee Midget

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #878 on: March 25, 2012, 02:57:14 PM »
THAT,,^^^^^^^^^^ Is how this thread works.. BRAVO !!!!! :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:

Got it - Steven Wright appearing on the Gong Show.
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #879 on: March 30, 2012, 09:38:15 AM »
what do you get if you light a match under a duck`s tail????...Fire quacker... :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #880 on: March 30, 2012, 09:56:49 AM »
How do cows do math?
They use a COWculator.

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #881 on: March 30, 2012, 09:59:50 AM »
The New England Journal of Medicine just announced the results of their latest study....
towels are the leading cause of dry skin.

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #882 on: March 30, 2012, 10:03:40 AM »
What is the best time of day to make a dentist appointment?
At tooth hurty!

Offline Milwaukee Midget

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #883 on: March 30, 2012, 10:41:42 AM »
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #884 on: March 30, 2012, 12:48:22 PM »
What is a dentists favorite musical instrument?
A tuba toothpaste....