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Author Topic: Stupid joke Friday  (Read 1155189 times)

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Offline debgeo

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #540 on: December 03, 2010, 08:00:47 AM »
 :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:
George---Sidecar in progress

Offline theazoldcrow

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #541 on: December 03, 2010, 09:10:52 AM »
 :roll: AAAAAWWWWW  come on!  I get some of my best material from here!  ( Thats a joke Son!)
The Earth, is an intergalactic insane asylum.!

Offline k.h.

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #542 on: December 03, 2010, 09:34:26 AM »
This woman walks into a bar, and she has the hairiest armpits in the history of armpits. She sits down, raises her arm, and says, "Bartender, I would like a drink." There's an old drunk sitting next to her. Slurring, he says, "Barkeep, I would like to buy the ballerina a drink." She accepts, drinks it, raises her arm again to get the bartender's attention, and orders another. The old man says, "Barkeep, you just keep giving the ballerina anything she wants." Finally, the bartender goes over to the drunk and says, "Sir, that's nice of you, but how do you know she's a ballerina?" The old man answers, "Son, you don't get to be my age without learning that only ballerinas can lift their legs that high."
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice.  But in practice, there is.--Jan L. A. Van de Snepscheut

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #543 on: December 03, 2010, 11:39:54 AM »
Guy goes to the doctor and says ' You have to help me, I`m turning into a set of curtains"....Doc. says " You have to pull yourself together"........................

am I the only one who thinks this thread is drawing to a close?
Doc, You need this more than I do   www.instantrimshot.com :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #544 on: December 03, 2010, 08:05:26 PM »
Friday bonus for Doc.G`s Mrs.    What would you call bears without ears??...."B" :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #545 on: December 10, 2010, 04:53:58 AM »
Who rides around in a sleigh biting people ???....Santa Jaws :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Seldom Seen Slim

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #546 on: December 10, 2010, 10:57:38 AM »

A young Arab asks his father:

What is this weird hat that we are wearing?

Why, it's a "chechia" because in the desert it protects our heads from the sun!

And what is this type of clothing that we are wearing?

It's a "djellabah" because in the desert it is very hot and it protects your body!

And what are these ugly shoes that we have on our feet?

These are "babouches", which keep us from burning our feet when in the desert!

Tell me, Father. . .?                                                                                   

Yes my son?       

Why are we living in Dearborn, Michigan and still wearing all this stuff?

Jon E. Wennerberg
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Offline 4-barrel Mike

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #547 on: December 10, 2010, 11:48:49 AM »
Hmm, okay.  My crazy uncle in Red Bluff sent this:



Mike
Mike Kelly - PROUD owner of the V4F that powered the #1931 VGC to a 82.803 mph record in 2008!

Offline Seldom Seen Slim

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #548 on: December 10, 2010, 01:18:19 PM »

HOW IS NORMA?

A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Joseph's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"

The operator said, "I'll be glad to help, dear. What's the name and room number of the patient?"

The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, "Norma Findlay, Room 302."

The operator replied, "Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse's station for that room."

After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said,
"I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow."

The grandmother said, "Thank you. That's wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good news."

The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?"

The grandmother said,"No, I'm Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me subaru."
Jon E. Wennerberg
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 (that's way up north)
2 Club member x2
Owner of landracing.com

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #549 on: December 10, 2010, 02:10:26 PM »
??????....??????Blood "goof-off"??.....???Work-up?? Slim, Back those filter settings down a turn or two. :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Dr Goggles

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #550 on: December 10, 2010, 05:05:48 PM »
Friday bonus for Doc.G`s Mrs.    What would you call bears without ears??...."B" :cheers:

I set up some soooooper doooooper recording gear , when she heard that joke I captured this............

http://free-loops.com/2056-groan.html
Few understand what I'm trying to do but they vastly outnumber those who understand why...................

http://thespiritofsunshine.blogspot.com/

Current Australian E/GL record holder at 215.041mph

THE LUCKIEST MAN IN SLOW BUSINESS.

Offline debgeo

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #551 on: December 10, 2010, 05:39:41 PM »
Maybe Jon's definition of wo r k is goof-off  :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:
George---Sidecar in progress

Online Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #552 on: December 10, 2010, 08:07:32 PM »
??????....??????Blood "goof-off"??.....???goof-off-up?? Slim, Back those filter settings down a turn or two. :cheers:

Well someone did ask to filter that 4 letter word that starts with w....  :roll:
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #553 on: December 10, 2010, 08:33:35 PM »
Hey Slim...Your filter messed up my styling sig. line :-o
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Seldom Seen Slim

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #554 on: December 10, 2010, 08:41:56 PM »
Hey, that's cool.  Thanks for telling us all to look there, Jerry.  Maybe I'll work on another "w" word -- just to mess with your sig.
Jon E. Wennerberg
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