Landracing Forum Home
April 23, 2019, 10:51:36 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?

Login with username, password and session length
News:
BACK TO LANDRACING.COM HOMEPAGE
 
   Home   Help Search Calendar Login Register  


(Note: Donations are not tax deductible)







Live Audio Streaming and Archives of Past Events
Next Live Event: TBD
Pages: 1 ... 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 [259] 260 261 262 263 264 265 266   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Stupid joke Friday  (Read 849279 times)
0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3870 on: January 04, 2019, 01:19:33 PM »

Only if the weather swarm Chris.....
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3871 on: January 11, 2019, 10:13:39 AM »

Slim was in the hospital recovery room after surgery and a nurse asked how he felt.....He told her that he felt just fine ,but he did not care for the doctor`s use of a 4 letter word during the procedure...Nurse asked what 4 letter word that might have been and Slim replied..." Oops' cheers cheers evil
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
Stainless1
Administrator
Hero Member
***
Offline Offline

Age: 68
Location: Near Furley and Kechi KS
Posts: 7161


Robert W. P. "Stainless" Steele Wichita, Kansas



« Reply #3872 on: January 11, 2019, 10:34:41 AM »

Hey Slim... if they start feeding you yeast and Turtle Wax you are close too being released....

They expect you to rise and shine  cheers
Logged

Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3873 on: January 11, 2019, 11:01:44 AM »

If this helps Slim....My new Doctor looked over my medical records and said" You look much better on paper than you do in person...."
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
WOODY@DDLLC
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 74
Location: Morrow, OH 15 minutes from Mike Brown!
Posts: 1336


ECTA made it to AR-Kansas!


WWW

Ignore
« Reply #3874 on: January 11, 2019, 11:31:25 AM »

Doctor told Slim, "I have good news and I have bad news!"

Slim said, "Give me the bad news first!"

Doctor says, "We have to amputate both your feet!"  sad sad

Slim says, "WTF's the good news?"

Doc says, "We have a buyer for your shoes!"  shocked shocked

Hope you don't get this doctor, Slim!  cheers
Logged

All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3875 on: January 11, 2019, 12:18:43 PM »

Let`s all hope that Slim`s  Dr. doesn`t think a coma is a punctuation mark....
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3876 on: January 11, 2019, 12:19:36 PM »

Poor Jon....Patti has a boat-load of these..... cheers
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3877 on: January 11, 2019, 12:22:58 PM »

.Jon`s  doctor is so dumb...He thinks Red Blood Count is another name for Dracula.....
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
Seldom Seen Slim
Administrator
Hero Member
***
Offline Offline

Age: 71
Location: Skandia, Michigan
Posts: 12247


Nancy -- 201.913 mph record on a production ZX15!


WWW
« Reply #3878 on: January 11, 2019, 12:55:54 PM »

Okay, okay -- slow down, gents.  It turns out that. . .

So when I got back from Mayo it was after hours Friday before Christmas.  I was carrying a form for the dentist to attest that he had looked and there weren't any cooties in my mouth.  But - it was frickin' Christmas break so the dentist didn't open 'til last Monday.  And that's when he discovered the swamp growth in one of my fangs, so I had to have that yanked out this morning.  Fine, but now the surgery ain't happening 'til 21 February. 

Other detail:  When I scheduled the cutting it was with Nancy's remaining vacation days in mind.  She has to use 'em before the end of January.  All was gonna be perfect -- until this change.

So last night Nancy looked at me and said:  "You know, honey, how many times I've grumped that we never take a "real" vacation that doesn't include racing.  We use up all of my time at Bville.  That's okay, but since we've got this time already blocked out - - - let's go see my brother and his wife in Melborne Beach."

Gentlemen, I tell you this tidbit of sooth and ask that you harken carefully:  There are times when you should know to instantly fold your hand, smile, and go online to start shopping for tickets.

We fly out next Wednesday. cheers cheers
Logged

Jon E. Wennerberg
 a/k/a Seldom Seen Slim
 Skandia, Michigan
 (that's way up north)
2 Club member x2
Owner of landracing.com
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3879 on: January 11, 2019, 01:21:06 PM »

Great....Now we have to switch to dentists.....Or Floridians..... cheers
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
Stainless1
Administrator
Hero Member
***
Offline Offline

Age: 68
Location: Near Furley and Kechi KS
Posts: 7161


Robert W. P. "Stainless" Steele Wichita, Kansas



« Reply #3880 on: January 11, 2019, 06:17:46 PM »

Jerry... I thought dentists were Fluoridians  rolleyes  cheers
Logged

Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.
WOODY@DDLLC
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 74
Location: Morrow, OH 15 minutes from Mike Brown!
Posts: 1336


ECTA made it to AR-Kansas!


WWW

Ignore
« Reply #3881 on: January 11, 2019, 06:49:05 PM »

Slim, take your shoes with you - you won't get as much for your sandals!  shocked grin cheers
Logged

All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz
Stainless1
Administrator
Hero Member
***
Offline Offline

Age: 68
Location: Near Furley and Kechi KS
Posts: 7161


Robert W. P. "Stainless" Steele Wichita, Kansas



« Reply #3882 on: January 11, 2019, 09:22:04 PM »

Hey Slim it sounds like you will be in good hands.... the best cardiologists are in the heartland  cheers
Logged

Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3883 on: January 18, 2019, 09:23:52 AM »

Know what you call a dentist that doesn`t like tea?Huh ...Denis....
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
floydjer
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Age: 61
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 2787


"There is no duck side of the moon..."




Ignore
« Reply #3884 on: January 18, 2019, 09:24:39 AM »

I need to take my pet deer to the dentist...He has buck teeth...
Logged

I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
Pages: 1 ... 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 [259] 260 261 262 263 264 265 266   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2015, Simple Machines
Simple Audio Video Embedder
Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!


Google visited last this page February 16, 2019, 02:55:30 AM