Author Topic: Stupid joke Friday  (Read 949593 times)

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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3060 on: November 18, 2016, 07:42:36 AM »
....And the guitar of a teenager makes fine kindling as well...
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3061 on: November 18, 2016, 07:44:13 AM »
Just don`t waste the money for "Bear bells"...It`s a real b^tch getting them around their necks.....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3062 on: November 18, 2016, 09:52:07 AM »
The weekend is finally almost here.... for me the first five days after are always the hardest  :cheers:
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3063 on: November 18, 2016, 09:55:15 AM »
Just saw on the news that Trump will ban those bags of shredded cheese...
he will make America grate again
 :cheers: :cheers:
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.

Offline rouse

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3064 on: November 18, 2016, 10:00:24 AM »
Next Friday is black Friday....I think all Fridays matter

Rouse
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3065 on: November 18, 2016, 10:36:43 AM »
Black Friday....The only day that comes with a body count............
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3066 on: November 18, 2016, 06:29:12 PM »
Mrs. Floydjer decided we should try our hand at basic camping...so she bought a 2- man  pup tent. She was very disappointed when she opened the package and found that neither the men nor the pup were included....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3067 on: November 18, 2016, 08:48:49 PM »
Hey Jerry, Camping is Mother Nature's way of suggesting you should stay in the Motel 6
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.

Offline WOODY@DDLLC

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3068 on: November 25, 2016, 09:48:12 AM »
My wife says it's Marriott or she ain't going!  :x

1.      What’s the best part about living in Switzerland? I’m not sure, but the flag is a big plus.

2.      I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well actually, it’s more of a wrap.

3.      My family is always running late. In fact, our ancestors came over on the Juneflower.

4.      I came from a tough neighborhood. Once, I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3069 on: November 25, 2016, 12:15:15 PM »
Know the difference between an insurance agent and a mafia boss??  The agent can tell you how many people will die next year ...But the mob boss can tell you each one`s name.....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3070 on: November 25, 2016, 12:18:52 PM »
guy next door bought a new Lincoln town Car..So I went over to have a look....Peeked inside and it has a manual trans.  I said ' I didn`t know these came with a manual transmission"  They don`t" he said....had to order it special and it cost me big bucks....BUT,  the wife can`t drive a stick...." :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Seldom Seen Slim

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3071 on: December 02, 2016, 07:53:19 AM »
The two new doctors were attending the wake for the cardiologist.  The hospital liked to treat the docs very well -- so the guy's carcass was displayed in a lovely heart-shaped coffin.  The coffin was powered so it slowly closed and opened during the ceremony.

One of the new docs, a gynecologist, started giggling uncontrollably when he thought of his own demise -- and the proctologist fainted.
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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3072 on: December 02, 2016, 08:13:33 AM »
OK..If THAT is how you want to play....From Mrs. Floydjer the medical prof.......A nurse runs into a doctor`s office and yells  " Dr..The patient you just treated collapsed on the front steps..what should I do ' ???  the doc. says.." Turn him around so he looks like he was coming into the building"
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3073 on: December 02, 2016, 08:17:50 AM »
....Medical University  professor points to an x-ray and says "This patient has a severe limp.. as you can see...The patient`s fibula and tibia are radically arched....what would you do "??  A first year student raises his hand as says " Guess I`d limp too....."
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #3074 on: December 02, 2016, 08:46:22 AM »
Doctor returns from an elk hunting trip....Nurse asks how the trip went...Doc. says " didn`t kill anything...Should have stayed here....."
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.