Author Topic: Stupid joke Friday  (Read 923756 times)

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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2685 on: October 23, 2015, 02:06:02 PM »
Just ate at a Japanese motorcycle themed burger and wine bar called the "Cow 'N' Sake".
I`ve been there...waiter`s name was Won Hung Lo
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline RichFox

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2686 on: October 23, 2015, 02:19:21 PM »
Is he related to the flight deck crew of the Aisaina 777 that piled up at SFO? As reported by KPIX news Captain Sum Ting Wong. First officer Wi To Low. Second officer Bang Ding Ow. Check Captain Ho Lee Fuk . I saw and heard this on the news.

Offline bbarn

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2687 on: October 26, 2015, 09:55:25 AM »
Just ate at a Japanese motorcycle themed burger and wine bar called the "Cow 'N' Sake".
I`ve been there...waiter`s name was Won Hung Lo

The maitre d' is a little light in his loafers there...his name is He Chew Dingdong
I almost never wake up cranky, I usually just let her sleep in.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2688 on: October 26, 2015, 01:34:31 PM »
 :? :evil:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2689 on: October 30, 2015, 09:00:06 AM »
How did the Scottish dog feel when he entered the spook-house ???...terrier-fied...
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2690 on: October 30, 2015, 09:01:17 AM »
What do you get when you cross breed a dog with Dracula??...a blood hound...........
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2691 on: October 30, 2015, 09:10:07 AM »
I`ll apologize for this one later.............How do West Virginian`s celebrate Halloween???...pumpkin
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Stainless1

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2692 on: October 30, 2015, 09:32:55 AM »
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?


Pumpkin pi.
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2693 on: October 30, 2015, 10:12:41 AM »
Garage Journal jack-o-lantern
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Milwaukee Midget

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2694 on: October 30, 2015, 10:29:02 AM »
Garage Journal jack-o-lantern

My ex-wife's broom is having engine problems again.
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

We are NOT rebuilding . . . We are reloading.

GOD SAVE MG - The Queen can take care of herself!

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2695 on: October 30, 2015, 11:08:04 AM »
Garage Journal jack-o-lantern

My ex-wife's broom is having engine problems again.
At least she can drive a stick.......................
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Rcktscientist

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2696 on: October 30, 2015, 01:13:04 PM »
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.

Offline tallguy

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2697 on: October 30, 2015, 04:40:47 PM »
The average quality of today's postings (before this one) was pretty high.

This one will probably bring the average way down . . .


      Isn't it nice to be able to go online . . . and save a trip to the bathroom?

Offline 4-barrel Mike

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2698 on: October 30, 2015, 05:18:45 PM »
A normally nice young lady sent me the following, which I think fits this thread:

Yesterday, I had a flat tire on Trans Canada Highway.  So I eased my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully got out of the car and opened the trunk.
 
I took out 2 cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing oncoming traffic.
 
They looked so life like you wouldn't believe it!  They were in trench coats exposing their nude bodies to  the approaching drivers. 
 
To my surprise, cars started slowing down looking at my lifelike men which made it safer for me to work at the side of the road.  And of course, traffic started backing up.   Everybody was tooting their horns and waving like crazy.  It wasn't long before a police officer pulled up behind me.  He got out of his car and started walking  toward me.  I could tell he was not a  happy camper!   

What's going on here?

My car has a flat tire, I said calmly.
   
Well, he asked, what are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road?
   
I couldn't believe that he didn't know - so I told him, Hellooo!  Those are my emergency flashers!

Mike
Mike Kelly - PROUD owner of the V4F that powered the #1931 VGC to a 82.803 mph record in 2008!

Offline Speed Limit 1000

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2699 on: October 30, 2015, 06:59:26 PM »
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized She was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, “Business trip or pleasure?”

She turned, smiled and said, “Business. I’m going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston."

He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen Sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs!

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, “What’s your Business at this convention?”

“Lecturer,” she responded. “I use information that I have learned from my Personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.”

“Really?” he said. “And what kind of myths are there?”

“Well,” she explained, “one popular myth is that African-American men are The most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is That Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Mexican Descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with Absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck.”

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed.. “I’m Sorry,” she said, “I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don’t even know your name.”

“Tonto,” the man said, “Tonto Gonzales, but my friends call me Bubba".

 
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20