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Author Topic: Stupid joke Friday  (Read 574196 times)
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USFRAMONTE
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« Reply #2595 on: August 21, 2015, 11:39:18 AM »

Oh, eye see what you are saying !!
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floydjer
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« Reply #2596 on: August 21, 2015, 11:51:25 AM »

Just don`t make a spectacle of yourself Monte...................
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Ron Gibson
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« Reply #2597 on: August 21, 2015, 11:54:13 AM »

Stainless
I've heard of "farsightedness" but that is ridiculous.

Ron
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« Reply #2598 on: August 21, 2015, 02:54:06 PM »

Jerry, I am just trying to be a pupil of the pun!
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floydjer
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« Reply #2599 on: August 21, 2015, 03:21:58 PM »

focus Monte, ..focus
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USFRAMONTE
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« Reply #2600 on: August 21, 2015, 03:51:57 PM »

I am trying, but I recently found out I am bifocal.
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Ron Gibson
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« Reply #2601 on: August 21, 2015, 04:13:23 PM »

And I'll raise you to tri-focal.
Did you hear about the guy that needed an operation on his opti-rectal nerve? That is the one that runs between the eyes and the rectum that gives some people a $hitty outlook on life.

Ron   

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Life is an abrasive. Whether you get ground away or polished to a shine depends on what you are made of.
floydjer
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« Reply #2602 on: August 21, 2015, 04:37:42 PM »

I am trying, but I recently found out I am bifocal.
  I heard you people can legally marry now........................ ( that was Humor Monte ..calm down ) cheers
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floydjer
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« Reply #2603 on: August 28, 2015, 06:44:36 AM »

I rented a house to a pair of otters...Now they live in otter-space..............
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floydjer
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« Reply #2604 on: August 28, 2015, 06:45:31 AM »

....and to keep their bagels from being stolen...They put lox on them...................
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Milwaukee Midget
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« Reply #2605 on: August 28, 2015, 08:46:53 AM »

Ain't easy being a landlord these days.

I rented a house to a pair of otters...Now they live in otter-space..............

You otter know better than that.

....and to keep their bagels from being stolen...They put lox on them...................

See?  Now you've got to change out the lox.

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"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  rolleyes

We are NOT rebuilding . . . We are reloading.

GOD SAVE MG - The Queen can take care of herself!
Stainless1
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« Reply #2606 on: August 28, 2015, 09:11:40 AM »

I tried to board an airplane with a dead possum and a dead raccoon I found on the road.  The lady at the gate said....


I'm sorry sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger
 cheers
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Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, MSA Bockscar Lakester with a little N20 
MSA Bockscar Lakester #1000 my fastest mile 245 and change, 84 ci turbobusa motor... but Corey's 233 MPH H/BFL record is still 3MPH faster than mine.
floydjer
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« Reply #2607 on: August 28, 2015, 09:30:22 AM »

...........quite the ...tor-rent of landlord jokes MM cheers
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Milwaukee Midget
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« Reply #2608 on: August 28, 2015, 11:06:54 AM »

I tried to board an airplane with a dead possum and a dead raccoon I found on the road.  The lady at the gate said....


I'm sorry sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger
 cheers

Those airlines - no sense of humor.

I bought a ticket for my gorilla, but when he tried to board, TSA stopped him at the gate.  I stepped up to the officer, and told him I'd vouch for him, and that we had a Simianic relationship.
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"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  rolleyes

We are NOT rebuilding . . . We are reloading.

GOD SAVE MG - The Queen can take care of herself!
floydjer
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« Reply #2609 on: August 28, 2015, 11:29:29 AM »

No kidding??? I just installed a doorbell  that uses the sound of a gorilla singing about table tennis.   I call it " The King Kong Sing-song- Ping pong - Ding -dong.   (gauntlet tossed )
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I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
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