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Author Topic: Stupid joke Friday  (Read 993800 times)

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Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2070 on: October 03, 2014, 12:03:55 PM »
Who let Monte out of his cage??   Whoever you are...I hope you are koala-fied to put him back :cheers:
« Last Edit: October 03, 2014, 12:08:42 PM by floydjer »
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline USFRAMONTE

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2071 on: October 03, 2014, 12:40:21 PM »
Who let Monte out of his cage??   Whoever you are...I hope you are koala-fied to put him back :cheers:

Go ahead and lock me up.....I will use my mon key to get right back out!!!

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2072 on: October 03, 2014, 01:41:09 PM »
Stay out of my flowers if you get out.....especially the..chimp-pansies.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline bbarn

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2073 on: October 03, 2014, 02:51:30 PM »
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then..." he sighed, "...let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box".
I almost never wake up cranky, I usually just let her sleep in.

Offline will6er

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2074 on: October 03, 2014, 09:50:06 PM »
Did you buy Humphrey at the Camelot?

Offline 4-barrel Mike

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2075 on: October 03, 2014, 10:21:21 PM »





Mike Kelly - PROUD owner of the V4F that powered the #1931 VGC to a 82.803 mph record in 2008!

Offline Peter Jack

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2076 on: October 04, 2014, 01:44:50 AM »
will6er, that one came very close to going right over my head. It took 4-barrel Mikes's laugh before I recalled Humphrey and it all made sense. I was starting to be afraid senility was winning out!  :-D :-D :-D :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:

Pete

Offline Freud

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2077 on: October 04, 2014, 11:28:01 AM »
I suppose that if you have to explain it to me

I'll still never understand.

I'll just go back to reading my Capt. Marvel comic book.

FREUD

I admit. i am getting OLD.
Since '63

Offline 4-barrel Mike

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2078 on: October 04, 2014, 01:06:18 PM »
Freud:

See reply #2064 on the previous page.

Mike
Mike Kelly - PROUD owner of the V4F that powered the #1931 VGC to a 82.803 mph record in 2008!

Offline Peter Jack

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2079 on: October 04, 2014, 03:10:19 PM »
I suppose that if you have to explain it to me

I'll still never understand.

I'll just go back to reading my Capt. Marvel comic book.

FREUD

I admit. i am getting OLD.


Not so quick Freud! You're just ageing gracefully like fine wine.  :-D :-D :-D

Pete

Offline tallguy

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2080 on: October 04, 2014, 05:29:52 PM »
First, I apologize that this isn't Friday.  It's sadderday (for all who read this, I'm afraid).

Knowing that many of us land speed racers (and fans) are old enough to know better,
I thought that this one might not be wasted on you:

2001: A Space Odyssey was written by Stanley Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke.  Can you
imagine what it would be like if it had been written by Cheech and Chong?  . . .

"Open the pod bay door, HAL.  I brought back Frank's body, that you sent flying off
into space.  You killed him, HAL."

"Who is it at the pod bay door?"

"It's me -- Dave.  Open the door, HAL."

"Dave?"

"Yeah."

"Dave's not here."

Robin UK

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2081 on: October 10, 2014, 06:00:51 AM »
A cowboy saunters into a German car showroom and he says: “Audi!”

I went to the record shop and I said: “What have you got by The Doors?”
He said: “A bucket of sand and a fire blanket.”

I went down the local supermarket, I said: “I want to make a complaint, this vinegar’s got lumps in it.”
He said: “Those are pickled onions"

Robin

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2082 on: October 10, 2014, 07:05:34 AM »
i`m trying to cross-pollinate poison ivy with clover...hopefully I`ll get a rash of good luck............
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline floydjer

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2083 on: October 10, 2014, 07:44:35 AM »
Might take my cat bowling....He is an alley cat................. :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Milwaukee Midget

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Re: Stupid joke Friday
« Reply #2084 on: October 10, 2014, 08:36:52 AM »

2001: A Space Odyssey was written by Stanley Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke.  Can you
imagine what it would be like if it had been written by Cheech and Chong?  . . .

"Open the pod bay door, HAL.  I brought back Frank's body, that you sent flying off
into space.  You killed him, HAL."

"Who is it at the pod bay door?"

"It's me -- Dave.  Open the door, HAL."

"Dave?"

"Yeah."

"Dave's not here."

Now THAT is Brilliant!
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

We are NOT rebuilding . . . We are reloading.

GOD SAVE MG - The Queen can take care of herself!