Stupid joke FRIDAY

[USFRAMONTE]

I thought the wife would be pleased to repair my torn jeans....Or sew it seams.................

Can't remember if I posted this one before?
What is the difference between a sewing machine and a kiss?

One sews seams nice, and the other seems so nice!

[USFRAMONTE]

What is brown and sits on a piano bench?


Beethoven's first movement!

[bbarn]

What's brown and sounds like a bell? 

Dung!

[Freud]

The guys at the barber shop asked me what actress I

would like to be stuck in an elevator with.
 
I told them the one who knows how to fix elevators.
 
I'm old, tired, and pee a lot.

FREUD

[floydjer]

I`ve decided to learn sign language......I think it will come in  handy..........................

[USFRAMONTE]

If Virginia wore Georgia's New Jersey, what would Delaware?

Idaho, Alaska.


Sorry, I'm running out of material!

[Seldom Seen Slim]

We're not sorry -- that you're running out of material.

[mitchell968]

 a man buys a car for his wife for christmas . "i dont like it " she says. " i want something that will go from 0-140 in 3 seconds. so he comes back with a set of bathroom scales and says "stand on this ,sweetheart ".                            whats the smallest part of a fiat ?  the owners brain.

[floydjer]

We're not sorry -- that you're running out of material.

Speak for yourself Slim....................Monte...Google "stupid jokes"

[USFRAMONTE]

Jerry,
As difficult as it is to keep up with you, I will have to make one of my new years resolutions to find some new material.

[floydjer]

How do snails fight??...They slug it out

[floydjer]

Two snowmen are standing in a yard when one of them says to the other...." Do you smell carrots " ?

[fastesthonda_jim]

I'd post a joke but the Ford guys can't read wrds more than 4 ltrs.  This is a good bit.
http://biggeekdad.com/2010/12/blackberry-not-working/
His look at 1:53 is pric eles s

[floydjer]

I was thinking about becoming a vegetarian......But that may be a huge missed steak.....................

[bbarn]

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? … Make me one with everything!