I still don't think I'm in the right state of mind right now, I drove all the way back home with dead friend's stuff in my truck still and haven't even sorted it out or contacted his family. ECTA thankfully did what I was unable to do which was make that dreaded phone call to his loved ones....I just did my best to focus on packing and getting home in one piece.
Gerald Deneau was father, a grandfather, a husband, an old school 10 second wheeliebar drag racer, Kawasaki ZX-12R rider, and an acquaintance who became a friend of mine as time progressed. I don't have his birthdate handy (I'm sure his wallet is somewhere in my truck I just can't get myself up to go through is stuff right now) but he was born in 1939 so I had a TREMENDOUS amount of respect for him not only riding a bike that was Kawasaki's fastest in the year 2000 but for him to express interest in land speed racing. Over the months (maybe its been years? time is a blur right now) we had discussed the possibility of him coming out and trying land speed racing. He was still a racer at heart because the boys in blue would still occaisionally pull him over....only to give him a warning when they saw his bright white head of hair. How are you gonna give Grandpa a ticket anyways?
In any case slowly over time he got his bike ready for his first land speed race. We had initially planned on coming out at the innaugural event but scheduling conflicts meant June was our best option. I picked him up the night before the race, we had already loaded up his ZX-12R on my trailer and I was bringing a friend's new for 2012 ZX-14R. We had the little 4 cylinder toyota packed to the hilt ready for an 8 hour drive through the night, complete with a pair of dogs too....which meant some stops along the way for some shuteye/stretching. He asked several times if I wanted him to share the driving privledges....but I wanted him to perform as best as he could so I let him snooze through the drive. Throughout the years I have become versed at driving through the night getting to the track.
We got to the track and he was quite excited and like me my first time a little unsure of the process so I helped him through the registration and tech inspection process. Those who met Gerald remember sometimes having to tell him something 2 or 3 times louder and louder because at 73 his hearing wasn't what it used to be. Of course my hearing is still fine because I could still hear him snore in the hotel room....but its all good, we're here to race
. I kept telling people in the pits i'd be a
if i was his age and still racing, especially a friggin ZX12!
Saturday rolls around and after breakfast and some zzzs we get to the track. I knocked off my shakedown run and went to work trying to get everything I could outta the new 14R. Meanwhile things weren't going as smoothly for Gerald. I had figured he would easily be done with his 125 and 150 runs quickly but sometimes he would undershoot the speeds, sometimes he had issues with shifting as his transmission proved to be tempermental. While I was hotlapping in the 190s trying different tucks against a not so impressed headwind I would go over things with Gerald and see how he was doing. After every run I'd go over what happened and try to make things easier and smoother. Hell any 12R racer at the track has gotten some sort of help from me if they were struggling or ever asked my 2 cents. I reminded him this is a 1 mile race, forget about the pressure in the beginning....if the transmission is being problematic in 2nd gear be easy on the bike, take your time, build up your speed gradually. He got close to his B licence clocking a 168 on saturday. He was happy that he broke his cherry but felt like he really didn't do as well as he could have. I had to remind him about my first time at the track boasting to Al the stater about going 200 only to clock 189 and go down the wrong part of the track....its hard in the beginning....there is so much going on.....and when you have mechanical issues and are still trying to get the feel of things it can get frustrating....but rather than making a big deal of the matter we just got some much needed dinner a the Chinese buffet and clocked in early for some zzzs. He was already snoring while I was dozing off to CSI or whatever was on TV.
Sunday morning we check out like most did after a nice breakfast. Refueled on the way to the track and discussed a new game plan. If you are having problems shifting a sequential transmission motorcycle without the clutch, try "granny shifting" it with the clutch. That way you can still get down the track. Better to go a couple mph slower because you used the clutch then being stuck in a gear the whole way down the track, right? He wasn't sure what speed or rpm or gear he should run up to because he didn't want to get in trouble for going too fast....I said Gerald....we still have a headwind.....if you go 180 balls out on a 175 run no one will kick you off the track. Its hard to run an EXACT speed sometimes doing licensing runs. You don't want to be staring at the speedometer or the tachometer too long and forget about the finish line. I recalled a time at the TX mile where I was really trying for 200 and kept zoning on the tach trying for 100 more RPM....I zoned too long and wondered how come I didn't see the mile marker in my right side peripheral yet.....I looked up and still didn't see ..... OH SHIT I MUST HAVE PASSED IT!!! Stopping at TX is no joke with only 1/2 a mile. If you've gobbled up some of that zoning out things can go bad quickly. I told him I had to get the bike hauled down in a major way and I went off in the grass maybe 20 or 30 feet sheepishly waiving my arm that I was ok and that I was an idiot to the first TX official I saw as I completed my not so U turn. I just wanted him to enjoy the run and not stress about the speed, the gear, the RPM, etc and focus on a smooth and safe run. I reminded him he wasn't gonna do 200, he wasn't gonna get a record, he just needed to make a clean pass, thats it. We even talked doing a rider change for him in the morning to jockey the bike and see what was going on. But given the relatively better conditions we nixed that and decided to let him go through granny shifting with the clutch and just ride the bike. I also didn't want to steal his thunder...while I've jockeyed quite a few motorcycles I do realize sometimes there is a pride/ego thing for some and didn't want to step on his toes saying "Hey give me the bike I'll ride it and show you how its done" unless he asked. Its sometimes a sensative situation that takes some finesse discussing.
So we're in the staging lanes....8:30 I'm on the starting line and for the first time at the event I didn't get off the to talk to him, goof around, go through plan of action, see how he was doing, etc. I had a score to settle with this damned headwind and I was focusing on my run HARD because with the cool air I wanted to put together the best run possible. I get flagged to go and I do....I notice I picked up 100 rpms at the traps over my best the previous day....I knew the speed before I got the ticket....195 and change. Since he was staged directly behind me (3 rows wide) I figured 3 vehicles later I'd see him. I'm checking the bike, talking to another guy in the pits, etc. Get to chatting and after several minutes....I'm going "Hey where's Gerry?".....someone said something about a bike going down.
I SAID "SHIT!" I had a very bad feeling right then and there. I hopped on the 14 and went down the return road at....over 10 mph for sure. My heart is pounding and I'm just saying to myself "hope he's ok, hope its not him, his family will kill me, I should have never had him some with me" all the things your brain just thinks ... you have no control of what direction your brain is going. I get to the end of the track before the track. I don't see a green zx12 or an older guy dusting himself off....I see Keith and he waves me up....Fiat Fiat Fiat Fiat Fiat Fiat Fiat....I say WAS IT A GUY ON A GREEN ZX12....AND OLDER GUY??!?!! He asked if the guy came with me I said yes of course I was his ride to and from the track we split a hotel too. I don't remember everything after that, once he said coroner I just...I was in total shock. I remember looking down at the 14 and teardrops peppering the gas cap as I held my head.
Honestly the rest is a haze.....what happened? How did 175 mph go so wrong? Was it a medical issue? Mechanical issue? Was he confused about where the finish line was? Was he just trying too hard to go too fast this time around? I wish I knew...and yet I know no matter what it doesn't change anything, he's gone. And I feel like total shit for ever having brought him out. I know I'm not to blame, he was a grown man and wanted to race and do it the right way, the safer way, the legal way. Its the only real way to explore the limits of bikes this fast without ending up in jail....or worse. But I can't help but still feel like I had a say in it. I took him under my wing and tried to help him achieve a goal, a dream. And at 73 it is my understanding that his wife was finally ok with the notion. I feel like I can't look anyone in his family in the eye at the funeral without them looking at me going "You are the guy who got gerald into this sorta going stupid fast thing...he was a 73 year old guy what the Fiat were you thinking?!" And yet all I did was think about his safety....I made him get a new helmet, back protector, taped up the bodywork below thats known to get crooked on zx12s at speed, checked his tire pressure for him at the track, his oil level, made sure the brakes felt ok in the pits. I had even taken the bike to over 180 mph in the past to make sure it was "safe and stable". I felt like I tried to catch whatever possible problem there could be and help him through it....and reminded him that at 73 he was definately 1 in a million racing a bike like this.
It was a long drive home home....blurry eyed here and there, I just needed to stay on the road, I didn't want to pull off the road too long and THINK. Coffee for lunch and 2 beers for dinner. Its Monday morning and I don't feel any better. I know he went out doing what he loved, literally. And I know it will take a long time for me to get through this. Thanks to everyone in the pits, ECTA officials and others for the kind words after the fact.
Godspeed Gerald "Grandpa" Deneau
Ali
