Author Topic: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread  (Read 703735 times)

0 Members and 5 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline 4-barrel Mike

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3173
  • Any fool can drive a V8
Mike Kelly - PROUD owner of the V4F that powered the #1931 VGC to a 82.803 mph record in 2008!

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4242
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #676 on: March 06, 2014, 09:26:31 AM »
You guys do know that God is a Mopar man???   Jeremiah 32-37  "....I shall drive then out in my Fury " :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Online Seldom Seen Slim

  • Nancy and me and the pit bike
  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 13158
  • Nancy -- 201.913 mph record on a production ZX15!
    • Nancy and Jon's personal website.
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #677 on: April 05, 2014, 09:39:57 AM »
Since it's now Saturday I'll put this here instead of the Friday location:

I was walking along Clifton beach in Marquette when I came across a lamp partially buried in the sand.

I picked up the lamp and gave it a rub. A genie appeared and told me I had been granted one wish.

I thought for a moment and said, "I want to live forever."

"Sorry," said the genie, "I'm not allowed to grant eternal life."

"OK then, I want to die only when any American government balances its budget, eliminates its debt and stamps out corruption”

"You sneaky bastard," said the genie...............

Jon E. Wennerberg
 a/k/a Seldom Seen Slim
 Skandia, Michigan
 (that's way up north)
2 Club member x2
Owner of landracing.com

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4242
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #678 on: April 07, 2014, 10:10:36 AM »
Hmmmmm....Good thing you didn`t request a foot tall rooster......................... :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline fastesthonda_jim

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 587
  • Ready to Rock 2003
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #679 on: April 08, 2014, 08:14:50 PM »
Are you referring to the "Seldom Seen" part of "Slim"?
2006 SCTA High Points Champeen
2006 Dirty "2" Wrench Of The Year
Bonneville "2" Club 2003
El Mirage Dirty "2"'s 2006
Bonneville Records: G/GS, F/GS (Boy)  G/FS (Girl)
El Mirage Records: F/BFS, F/FS, F/GS, I/FS, I/GS, K/BGS
FIA Records A, II, 8
Unlimited License
300mph line qualified (305.129 best mile speed)
The older half of San Diego's Fastest Couple
2016 Man of Distinction Award
DLRA 2019 Top Speed of The Meet (309.438 Mile - 323.3 GPS)

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4242
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #680 on: April 09, 2014, 11:01:23 AM »
Are you referring to the "Seldom Seen" part of "Slim"?
uhhh...............Yes :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline Speed Limit 1000

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1396
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #681 on: April 09, 2014, 03:16:38 PM »
I've had a Phd since I was 15. A pretty hard *ick :evil:
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4242
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #682 on: April 09, 2014, 03:24:37 PM »
No kidding?? I was born with OCD....Old Car Disorder.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline USFRAMONTE

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 688
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #683 on: April 09, 2014, 04:00:57 PM »
Jerry, didn't you mean to say "old codger disorder"?

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4242
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #684 on: April 10, 2014, 10:27:46 AM »
Pace yourself Monte :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline USFRAMONTE

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 688
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #685 on: April 10, 2014, 11:23:25 AM »
Jerry, that's exactly what my wife says to me!

Online Seldom Seen Slim

  • Nancy and me and the pit bike
  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 13158
  • Nancy -- 201.913 mph record on a production ZX15!
    • Nancy and Jon's personal website.
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #686 on: April 10, 2014, 12:57:16 PM »
Monte, did you leave off the first few words of her comment to you?  Something like "Pick up the. . ."? :roll:
Jon E. Wennerberg
 a/k/a Seldom Seen Slim
 Skandia, Michigan
 (that's way up north)
2 Club member x2
Owner of landracing.com

Offline floydjer

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4242
  • "There is no duck side of the moon..."
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #687 on: April 10, 2014, 02:34:54 PM »
 :?..............Friday already???
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Offline USFRAMONTE

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 688
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #688 on: April 10, 2014, 03:17:19 PM »
Just warming up......trying to pace myself!

Offline fastesthonda_jim

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 587
  • Ready to Rock 2003
Re: The un-official Land Racing Joke Thread
« Reply #689 on: April 17, 2014, 12:27:47 PM »
Sighhh..... the frustrating life of an aging Landspeed racer

http://arloandjanis.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/1985-10-11-gauzy-blouses.gif
2006 SCTA High Points Champeen
2006 Dirty "2" Wrench Of The Year
Bonneville "2" Club 2003
El Mirage Dirty "2"'s 2006
Bonneville Records: G/GS, F/GS (Boy)  G/FS (Girl)
El Mirage Records: F/BFS, F/FS, F/GS, I/FS, I/GS, K/BGS
FIA Records A, II, 8
Unlimited License
300mph line qualified (305.129 best mile speed)
The older half of San Diego's Fastest Couple
2016 Man of Distinction Award
DLRA 2019 Top Speed of The Meet (309.438 Mile - 323.3 GPS)